For many families, bedsharing is a beautiful, practical, and deeply connected way to meet a child’s nighttime needs. It fosters closeness, makes night feeds easier, and provides comfort for both parent and child. But at some point, you might start wondering if it’s time for a change.

Maybe you’re expecting another baby, need more space, or feel that your child (or you!) would benefit from a little more independent sleep. Whatever your reason, know that there’s no ‘one-size-fits-all’ approach to transitioning away from bed sharing. Around the world, children sleep with their parents or siblings for years, and what works for one family may not suit another. The best time to make the transition is whenever it feels right for your family’s needs, your living situation, and—most importantly—your child’s readiness.

That said, any sleep transition is an adjustment, especially when your child has spent months or years sleeping close to you. Moving to their own sleep space is a big shift, but with a gentle, responsive approach, you can make the process smoother and reassuring for both of you.

Here’s how to ease the transition while keeping connection, security, and emotional well-being at the heart of the process.

1. Set the stage with positive stories

Children learn through stories, and reading books or using social stories can help them feel excited about the change. Hearing about other children (or even their favorite toys) moving to their own bed makes the experience feel normal and safe.

You may want to try reading a bedtime book together about a character who moves to their own bed and talk about how they might feel. Make up a little story about their stuffed animal getting a “big bed” too!

2. Get them involved

Giving your child some control over the process can make a big difference. Let them choose new bedding, a cuddly sleep companion, or a special night light to make their space feel cozy and inviting. If possible, set up their sleep space together so they feel ownership over their new bed.

3. Break it down into small, gentle steps

A gradual approach can help ease the transition. Instead of expecting them to sleep in their new bed all night from day one, take it slow. This can take may forms:

• Start with naps in their own bed.
• Sit beside them as they fall asleep.
• Lie down with them for part of the night before returning to your bed.
• Use a floor mattress in their room as a stepping stone.

Sleeping independently is a skill that takes time. It’s completely normal if they need extra support.

4. Expect ups and downs—That’s normal!

Sleep transitions are rarely linear. Your child may sleep independently for a while and then need extra reassurance—especially during illness, big developmental leaps, or life changes (like a new sibling). This doesn’t mean you’re going backward! It’s simply part of the process.

Instead of seeing setbacks as failures, view them as a natural part of your child adjusting at their own pace.

5. Make it playful & fun

Play is how children process change! Try role-playing bedtime with stuffed animals, setting up a cozy “sleeping tent,” or turning the transition into an adventure.

For example, you can reate a “sleeping game” where their teddy bear gets tucked into bed first. Let them practice being grown-ups by putting their toys to bed!

6. Offer extra reassurance & connection

For some children, sleeping separately can feel like a big emotional shift. Offer plenty of connection before bedtime—cuddle, sing, rub their back, or whisper something comforting. Let them know they’re safe, and that you’re always nearby if they need you.

7. Find what works for your child

Not all children respond to the same strategies. Some need a step-by-step approach, while others thrive with a more playful or imaginative transition. Follow your child’s cues, and be flexible in adjusting the approach as needed.

Trust yourself—you know your child best, and what matters most is making the transition feel safe and supported.

There’s no perfect way or timeline for transitioning from bed sharing. The key is to approach it with patience, understanding, and responsiveness to your child’s unique needs. By keeping the process gentle, flexible, and reassuring, you can help your child feel confident sleeping independently—at a pace that feels right for them.